Boundaries for Healers and their Families

(Yes, folks, I actually this to my family! I’m posting it here in case it’s useful to other healers.)

My Policy on “Doing” Healing for Family Members

Dear Family (kids, spouse, parents, siblings, nephews/nieces, cousins, in-laws etc)

The reason for writing down my policy is two-fold. First, it gives me an effective, efficient, clear structure for how to do healing work with you, while relieving my sense of overwhelm that I should be helping my family 24/7 and my guilt about not helping 24/7. Second, it clarifies for you how to actually get help from me.

1. I will do healing sessions for you, without your permission or request, if you have an emergency or serious acute situation.

2. I will not do healing sessions for you, for a chronic long-term condition, minor injury, other non-emergency situations like cold, flu, heachache, pain, depression, relationship problem, stress, etc… unless you specifically request that I do so.

3. If you want me to do a healing session with you, you must ask me. I will not offer, unless it’s an emergency or you are not physically capable of asking. When you are a willing participant who takes responsibility for your own healing, I am more than willing to work with you. I am honored to help.

4. Healing is not something that I do to you. The healer “doing healing to” a healee, can work very well in the initial phase of their relationship, or for a young child, or in an emergency. But after that initial phase is over, or the child becomes self-aware and self-competent, healing work for non-emergency conditions must be mutually agreed upon. And more importantly, you must take responsibility for your own on-going healing. I can open doorways to Wholeness for you, but I cannot be constantly pushing you through them!

5. Please expand your expectations of the possible result of the healing session to include a) infinite limitless instant healing; b) no discernible change; and c) anything in between. Your non-attachment to the outcome of the healing paradoxically gives you a better chance at good results – as does your willingness to allow change in your information-field.

6. The kind of healing work that I do is not “curing”. Your medical diagnosis, the conventional explanation, and the so-called common-sense cause of your condition is just a tiny fraction of your issue, from an energy/information standpoint. If you ask me to work with you, be prepared to work on your whole life in all dimensions – not just on your local complaint. The goal of any “healing” that I do is Alignment with Wholeness. When alignment is achieved, healing can happen quickly, because…

7. Healing is a Side-Effect of Wholeness.

Looking forward to healing with you!

Love and wholeness,

Elma

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Comments

  1. way to go Elma, and Thank you.
    You help me every time I tune in to Wholeness.
    Love it.
    Simplicity now.
    Berni

  2. Thanks, Sheila!
    I just wanted to update you on how this new policy is going. Uh, there are glitches!

    For instance, my mom was annoyed that I sent her my policy in writing. And then a few weeks later, she didn’t remember the details anyway. When she complained about her heart condition, and I reminded her that she needs to ask me to work on her, she said “Do I need to be dying in the gutter before you’ll work on me?” And then she goes “You can’t do anything about my problem anyway. It’s a physical condition, what could you possibly do to help that?”

    Ouch! Aargh! Ok, I’m neutral and non-attached! Neutral neutral neutral… to the fact that mom has conveniently forgotten all those miraculous healings I did for her, and my new policy too! NEUTRAL, I say!!!

    So much for my clarity of intention!

    But even though this new policy has not solved all the complexities of healing my own family, it’s a start. And it is working with most of my other family members. I just thought you might want to know that it ain’t perfect!

    Let me know how it works for you!

    love and wholeness,
    Elma

  3. Hi Elma:

    This is a very good policy. I am going to try and instil this in my own life as I have been unsure how to handle this myself.

    Thank you once again for sharing your insight.

    Sheila

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